healing my inner child

what lies beneath the surface of my soul…

the soul of a child who’s innocence was taken from them

used and abused

confused

silenced.

a child who felt they were the only one in this world who could protect themselves because no one else did

a child who’s family wasn’t shown the love needed to heal from the cruel world they faced

a child who took on the weight of the world in an attempt to find a sense of purpose they never received from themselves.

that child lives on, waiting to be healed

waiting for the love they were never shown

perception is a crazy thing

constantly taking what we are too afraid to give

who deserves to know those parts of me?

the parts Ive tried so hard to keep under lock and key

who deserves to see the real me?

… who am I?

a person who never felt they had a place in this world.

always isolated

always alone

consumed by the perception of others

in my 21 years of life I have experienced enough trauma and heartbreak to last a lifetime

trauma that left me numb to the world

numb to myself.

I have mastered the art of disassociation

a practice that protected my inner child from years of verbal, mental, and sexual abuse

a practice that protected me through home raids, a life on the run, and the final moment when my dad was taken away in cuffs

a practice that protected me through my transition and all the heavy emotions that came with it

a practice that allowed me to shut off the world so that I could live on

you are safe now.

heal from all the wounds the universe has caused you, there was a reason for it all.

heal that inner child so that they may blossom into the adult they were meant to be.

you are exceptional.

your story holds power.

remember who you are, where you came from, and how you got here

remember that most people couldn't imagine and therefore cant understand the situations youve faced

you cannot be disvalued by anyone who hasn't walked a mile in your shoes

you are a survivor.

only you know the battles you’ve overcome

you matter

if you choose to.